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Notes & Memos

by NISULA

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1.
Six Feet 05:40
My mind is a mess of cables searching for connections My heart is a marching band marching without direction A coin flip decision that landed on the ridge Should I build or burn a bridge? I knew a word could fix this, just didn't know which one 'Hate' is so strong, and 'love' it weighs a ton So I rambled trying to find the answer, dug a hole so deep Just push the dirt in on me, and this promise I will keep It won't hurt, when you finally forget It won't feel, like I'm standing in your chest Memories whether good or bad, will surely stick around But at least I won't destroy you from six feet underneath the ground So place a rock, or rose or a stump or a vase To mark my grave and memory, the last time you saw my face And those times I raised my voice, I hope the echo will recede But if it all just went away, wouldn't I be getting off easy? So while you're out there without me, fingers crossed you're happy I'll be following the breadcrumbs, back to when you still loved me And scratching my nails into the walls of this box Counting the days you've been gone while I lay here to rot It won't hurt, when you finally forget It won't feel, like I'm standing in your chest Memories whether good or bad, will surely stick around But at least I won't destroy you from six feet underneath the ground
2.
Eight States 04:36
Headed home in the backseat of your new to you SUV only 15 miles until home not wasting gas on the AC Paused my CD player just to listen to the wind On the radio's a country song, arm out the window you're singing It could be all the white noise but you don't have a bad voice I wonder if you'da gone far if it wasn't for us boys 8 states away with a fake stage name just to keep some privacy In that life I don't exist but I wonder if you'd think of me I've only seen the side of you that told me to behave I wish he could see the time he wasted and the time that you gave I know that life is just a string with pins all clipped across Representing experiences gained or experience lost But you my dear are the pin that holds me up against the wall And at the other end is a woman who makes me feel 10 feet tall To every question she's the answer, yes or no true or false My every will, my every way, the purpose for my pulse Our lives are just the results of circumstance Our minds are symphonies, our hearts just here to dance With you I'll be dancing hand in hand We'll always been dancing hand in hand So when you feel small Look to me see what came from that pile of pieces without instructions And when you feel weak Don't. Give. Up. So when you feel lonely Look for me and find that without you I cannot function And when the going gets tough Don't. Let. Go.
3.
Out of Luck 04:09
They say if you don't like the weather, Just wait a few minutes But it's seems like it's always raining and I'm standing in it I can't stand the sound of silence so I hold plug my ears I've been waiting nothing's changing, I've been waiting for years They say it looks like you've got a case of the Mondays Well I've been having a Monday kind of year It'll all get better on the weekend, just wait for the weekend I've been waiting nothing's changing, I've been waiting for years Take the good with the bad, they said Well maybe bad is the best I've had If you go uphill on the way there, it's downhill on the way back I've been waiting for the downhill I've been waiting for years Ups and downs Down and outs Out of luck my luck will come soon
4.
This hotel room smells of years and years of past guests and their fallen tears Issues stacked on the bedside tables, hearts broken by the truth behind fables Bottles line the dresser like targets, shooting each one in hopes i'll forget The walls wreak of stale cigarettes, some would say this is as good as it gets The floor creaks, the faucet leaks , the bed's as soft as mountain peaks The table's shimmed, the walls are thin, it's ugly no matter what you dress it in All this packed in my little rats nest, it's nothing fancy, no better than the rest It's not very homey, but it's home because you're here The peep hole's gone, it's just a hole in the door I know the place stinks but I can't smell it anymore Your shoes sit by the door, still tied in a bow, Your bag is filled with receipts because you just never know I spritz your perfume into the pillow to remind me, why i stay here I hope you find me Wrapped up in your towel, with this song on repeat, you're such a heavy walker I can still hear your feet The feeling's fading, you're almost gone, you went the same was as your big brother John You were fast asleep, deep in dreams, your last breath blew my heart to smithereens All that's packed into your final tomb, will come with me if I ever leave this room It's not home but it's were my heart is, because you're here I'll never leave unless you do Here in this bed, i'm home with you I'll bleed my viens dry just trying to saving this I'm home with you, our home is my bliss
5.
Used to Be 06:30
I remember we used to be kids, The miles we ran and the things we did The places we looked, the places we hid, I remember when we used to be kids I remember running against the wind, The grass on my feet, the sun on my skin Taking every punch right on the chin, Just waiting for real life to begin Every leaf was a four leaf clover, the sun went down, but the day wasn't over A life without trouble, weekends that never end, I remember when we used to be friends Somewhere along the way, we lost it, We were trying to grow up but we did the opposite Sliding down the same slope as all the others, I remember we used to be brothers Now you're afraid you won't make it one day, Without altering your mind in some way Well, life's a mountain so lets race to the top, Oh I remember when we couldn't be stopped No better time than now, look back and you'll see how to live life so free, being who you've always wanted to be I see now that I'm still a kid, no mattter what I said or what I did Same hopes and dreams i had all along, i'm gonna act on them, what could go wrong?
6.
Burned 04:35
Momma didn't raise no liar But my papa taught me well I learned it from the best of them And I'm going straight to hell I wouldn't say I'm not much a fan of the drink But there's been plenty to have an influence over me If I chose just one, it'd be the man who calls me son It's a spitting image, you'll see You've heard the story once, you'll be living it soon Just like my mother you'll be singing that sorry tune Like how'd I not think, you'd be leaving me here to sink While you took the life raft towards the moon Some lessons learned aren't so much taught as they are burned Straight into the memory of a child I had myself convinced that I knew the truth to all of this That which you said onto me was so And now I sit in the company of the unpopular outcast friend Hearing a story I heard before, but never from this end Now did you get fired, or did you just get tired did you really get fired *The thing about lies, is they're still there after you tell the truth The thing about lies, is a lies a lies a lies a lie* Momma didn't raise no liar, but my papa taught me well I learned it from the best of them and I'm going straight to hell
7.
I find comfort in the smell of cigarette smoke A late night in, a crooked smile, and a badly told dirty joke A bristly whisker kiss, just before i fall asleep A hundred mile stare thinking how'd you slip so deep It'll change your life they tell you, when see that perfect face A fresh clean slate, given by grace, a chance you have to take I lost you to the good times, I lost you to the blues I lost you to the successful extension of your youth If I could just go back I'd listen for every single sign or clue but I lost you, and the world did too Every ocean has a shoreline you'll never reach if you don't start Setting sail is the hardest but most important part An infinite example of whats right and what's for the best Asking what's the path to take now would be made in jest I lost you to the good times, I lost you to the blues I lost you to the successful surpression of the truth If I could just go back I'd listen for every single sign or clue but I lost you, and the world did too Woulda been, shoulda been, oh man you coulda something big i bet Just dabbling in disaster, hadn't even gotten your feet wet Your soul had spoiled years ago these days you're just a shell Regretful, nostalgic, spiteful, no logic; you've cast yourself to hell

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released December 31, 2016

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NISULA Rosamond, California

NISULA is a band from Southern California made of one person and a couple of guitars.

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